Sunday, July 26, 2009

Holy Discontent

I’ve been leading a women’s Bible Study at the church my husband and I attend in Redmond, WA. It’s not a complicated study nor does it appear very deep when one first looks through the guide itself. It is a study called Heart Renewal: Finding Spiritual Refreshment (currently out of print). Initially I thought it would be a “light” study, one that the women could benefit from without necessarily putting a lot into. It utilizes texts from various places in the Bible rather than going through one book, so it just didn’t seem like it would be that taxing. With lots of other summer activities, I wanted to “lure” the women to this study by promising them it wouldn’t be that hard—what about “refreshment” doesn’t sound light and easy??

To a certain extent that has been true. There are only ten to twelve questions that can be answered in 45 minutes or less. But they are not just surface questions. They open up little slits in your soul to let in the Holy Spirit who goes to work in His own stealth way.

The introductory study in the guide is called “Holy Discontent,” a look at Hannah and how she responded to her unhappiness at being barren (1 Samuel 1:1-20; 2:1-10). The quote at the beginning of the study is from a book by George MacDonald. The first sentence intrigued me:

“Of all things let us avoid the false refuge of a weary collapse, a hopeless yielding to things as they are.”

Can’t you just feel the weight of that on your shoulders? “… a hopeless yielding to things as they are.” It seems like so many people feel that way nowadays. We feel powerless to change things; we can even feel that our situation is just plain, old hopeless. But here is a woman who had had enough. Elkanah’s other wife had lots of children and Hannah had none. The other wife was always making fun of Hannah and pointing out to her that she was not carrying out her “wifely duties” so she had very little worth to society at that point. The sad part is that Hannah endured this provoking for many years; and she would endure it to the point of tears.

Until one day. Hannah had finally had enough. When she and her family went to the temple to make the ritual sacrifices, she took her unhappiness, her discontent, to God. The Bible says, “In bitterness of soul, Hannah wept much and prayed to the Lord.” She didn’t let her discontent fester any more. She finally took it to God and asked Him to do something!

In the end, God met her in her unhappiness. He provided her with a son, who she promised to dedicate to the service of the Lord. When he was born she named him Samuel. He became a prophet, the one who eventually identified David to become the king of Israel. His line is where Jesus came from. Imagine if she had been content to be harassed and just lived her life in bitterness?

“However,” you may say, “I have been discontent and prayed to the Lord about my situation and nothing has changed! What about me?” You’re in good company! Paul had the same issue. In his second letter to the Corinthians he says with some hindsight,

“To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me…. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:7-10)

Just because we ask doesn’t mean that our prayer will be answered the way we want it to be answered. What God wants more than anything is that we come to Him with our discontent; we don’t let it sit and make us more and more bitter. He wants us to be in relationship with Him, not off in a corner crying by ourselves! Hannah and Paul had it right. They were both very unhappy with the way things were in their lives. But they went to the Father and told Him how unhappy they were, and God remedied the situation by bringing them closer to Himself. Hannah was given the son she wanted, but Paul was not relieved of that thorn in the flesh. But he was drawn into a deeper relationship with God the Father.

If you’re discontent, talk to the Father!


Saturday, July 25, 2009

Is Blogging for Me?

Blogs. They are everywhere. I myself am a faithful follower of many blogs. So when I started thinking, “Is blogging for me?” I wondered if I had anything to add to the blogging world. It feels pretty daunting: Where do I start? What do I say? What do I even think that is important enough to share?

Theological observations, musings, and reflections are what I intend to contribute. In preparing to be a pastor, in the end I hope I am following in Eugene Peterson’s footsteps, who said, as he spoke to an audience in Seattle, “I wrote not to tell anyone anything, but to discover how to work with a congregation. I wrote to find out how to be a pastor.” I’m writing to discover what I think and how that connects with and influences what I do.

I love the arts, and that will certainly be included in this blog, musings on the arts, theology, spirituality, following Jesus.

So there it is. I hope you’ll join me on what will be for me an “adventure of discovery.” I hope it will be for you as well.